There was only a single view. A single point of perspective through which I viewed myself and others around me. At least, that was the perception of myself, or rather a lack of awareness of a deeper self and of the people around me. A naive, happy, and ideal view of everything. I see people as they present themselves, and assume that everybody is ideal, amazing, and always has great intentions, including myself. I speak my mind as a default mode of interaction and expect that others are doing the same. A curious little extrovert!

Life starts to challenge that nice little mental model. Without realizing it, mental defences and traps of disappointment have been sown in the mind, and other nameless types of negative thoughts have made themselves at home in the corners of my mind. The ideal worldview seems flawed. People, not as they seem to be. However, the conflict in the mind is suppressed, overpowered by the need to preserve the built-up ideal mental model of the self. Disregard the dissonance and power through. Kill the inner child.

Life pulled and stretched me in multiple dimensions across various directions through family, work, and relationships. Things made less sense as time and people went by. I found myself fundamentally changed, against the natural alignment of my inner self. I even tested differently on my MBTI test. I got good at playing roles set upon me by other people. My mind stretched till it broke. This has to change. It did. Like dominoes.